Cheat Code

Funny how certain questions seem to come in waves. This week I’ve gotten at least five different people asking me if I’d cheat on my husband. Those of you who’ve followed me closely know that the answer is no. I am still very much in love with my man and don’t see a future where I’m not. If, by some unforeseen circumstance, I did fall for another guy, I would leave my marriage before I cheated.

One of the messages I got alluded to whether or not I considered exchanging x-rated messages with strange men online a form of cheating. If I did, I wouldn’t do it – ipso fatso, I don’t consider my online activities to be cheating. I’m not certain that my dear husband would feel the same. I do think he’d be upset if he discovered that I’m secretly corresponding with a host of horny men who tell me about their cocks, masturbation habits, and sexual activities in detail. (Although, I doubt he’d be upset over all the women who tell me about their pussies, masturbation habits, and kinky sexual activities.) It would lead to some uncomfortable conversations, but I don’t believe it would put our marriage in jeopardy. I supposed I’d be jealous if I found out he was doing what I’m doing with other women, but I feel like I’d be able to understand and accept it as long as it only went so far.

I do believe that it’s possible to have an emotional affair online, and that this could rise to the level of cheating. I always try to keep my interactions with my readers at a level where we can share very private and intimate things with each other, but where the personal connection doesn’t go beyond the casual friend zone. I’ve heard from some of my porn-pals that they are “in love” with me, but I know this is more a matter of them being in love with the idea of me. DirtyMindedMom is all me, but I’m not all DirtyMindedMom (if that makes any sense). In other words, DMM is just a part of who I am – a distillation of the most perverted and depraved aspects of my psyche – and not the true whole.

The odd thing is, as horny as I am these days I don’t look at other men with any sort of real lust. I will occasionally notice a handsome guy, or a gentleman with a nice body, but I never make that mental leap and think, “Boy, I’d like to swallow his cock!” or “Come bend me over and fuck me silly, hot stuff!” I know a dirty mind like mine should go there almost by instinct, but for some reason it never does. To make things somewhat stranger, I do think (and sometimes say) those sorts of things when I’m watching porn. “I want that cock in my cunt,” and “Shoot your cum all over me,” are a couple things I’ve blurted out loud as I’m about to orgasm while watching a hot stud fucking like crazy.

Now, if I wasn’t married, I’m almost certain I’d be a huge slut. I wouldn’t have even considered saying this a year ago, but since I started writing porn my attitudes about sex have undergone some seismic shifts. Yes, I still believe that there is a very real place for sex as a sacred bond between a man and a woman that signifies their deep commitment to one another. But now I see that sex can also be a recreational expression signifying nothing more than a desire to give and receive pleasure. If I were single (and I’m not saying this just to be a cock tease), I would very likely be fuck buddies with any of my unmarried readers who were willing to come meet me in a hotel by where I live. I’d also happily accept all of the several invitations I’ve gotten from couples to join them for some fun. And I’d most definitely have to try sex with another woman to see what that’s all about. It’s probably a good thing that I’m married or I’d be a real mess!

So, bottom line, I’m not a cheater – never have been, never will be. Even if hubby wanted to get into swinging and gave me permission to play with other men, that doesn’t appeal to me at all. For the kind of relationship we have, something like that would spell the beginning of the end for us. I wouldn’t trade my marriage for sex. I know there are many couples out there who are able to share their partners with others and their relationship thrives as a result, but I’m not wired like that. My husband has his faults, but he is a good partner, a caring lover, a dependable provider, and a loving father to our children. Plus, he’s got a beautiful cock. With all that in my bed next to me every night, why would I ever want another man?

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12 thoughts on “Cheat Code

  1. Rachel, very well put!!! The fantasies you provide and transfer are merely that: fantasies. And although many of us, whether we have relationship problems or not, get excited (and jerk off), in our hearts know that it all lives in our mind as a fantasy….and fantasies always hold the spectre of hope…that the the fantasy will become reality. With DMM we know that it will not be so, even thought we may look for you in the suburban mall.

  2. (wandering meandering oh god I hope I made even a little bit of sense post below)

    These types of posts have always been… tensely received, and conversations such as this, no matter how well written (and as usual this is another fine post) becomes more about how high and mighty one is and less about actual thought exchange. Especially when the post is written by a woman, which makes me so happy to see that it’s 2015 and we are an enlightened and accepting civilization. Sigh.

    To me this has gotten worse, as the internet, full of anonymity, has become awash in judgment and condemnation; then of course we devolve into schoolyard versions of ourselves and suddenly we are hearing of doxx and swatting why won’t DMM meet me online the cocktease and oh my here we go. The great thing, and in some ways this post’s saving grace as it were, is the little community that you have built here seems supportive, accepting and kind, rather then the hive of scum and villainy that most of the internet has become. This is a safe place, which is such a rarity.

    For me, the courage it takes for a woman, in the age of Gamergate and the like, to speak about and share what is here should be applauded, cheered, celebrated, and yet I have the distinct feeling that there is alot more negative then positive in the experience. I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be as strong if I were a woman in this time; hell from what I have seen and heard from Gamergate alone I know if I had different mommy/daddy parts that there is a convent roster spot with my name on it, never to see or hear of the internet again.

    I don’t necessarily agree with the idea that exchanging x-rated messages with someone other then your spouse or partner is not cheating. For me, if I had to hide it, I shouldn’t be doing it, especially when it comes to sharing something sexual. That, unfortunately, is a learned behavior in my case, something I learned the hard way. Not to sound prudish however, because if I didn’t have to hide it, as it was a shared experience, giddy up it’s male slut time!!

    But that’s me, and who am I to judge anyone else, and their views or situation? Unfortunately, that isn’t the way the internet works, an it wouldn’t shock me in the slightest to see or hear that you receive negative responses, and with anonymity being what it is, I am sure that those negative responses will be chock full of sunshine and lollipops.

    Something a wise old fool once told me, and I do believe it to be true as he was happily married to an adoring woman for a long, long time, was the idea that you could window shop all you want, but never take your credit card out to buy, because that debt might very well be too much for you to handle. I think it is healthy to look at others, and to me people watching is a fun and sexy activity with your partner!

    From experience, both as the wanderer and one who has been stepped out on, that debt is one that lasts a lifetime, and it changes you. For that reason alone my cheat code is hell no, never again.

  3. I recently watched a t.v series called ‘Girlfriends Guide to Divorce’.
    https://eztv-proxy.net/
    It centered on this very subject. Women gets involved over the internet
    It becomes intensely romantic. She gets caught and her marriage falls apart.

    She decides to meet up with said romeo. And it ended up being the funniest, stupidest worst sex of her entire life at the cost of her sanity,
    husband and family…..

  4. Monogamy is a respectable and intelligent choice, even in our do what you feel like society. We can have a lot of fun here on line; but in the end, at least for me, I take it all home to my woman. And maybe the upside of our on line shenanigans is inspiration. She might not know why I am as randy on a particular night as I am; but my sex talk will have more meaning and I will be much more complimentary about her and her physical attributes. There is nothing wrong with fantasy, but one must be able to discern between fantasy and reality. I love reading good erotica, enjoy some “porn,” especially one site I belong to, Zoig. But in the end, my needs and my hard-on all end up with and in her. No apologies offered! Besides, it took me too long to find a woman to put up with me, and after over 35 years, I’m not gonna jeopardize that part of my life. I’m a self acknowledged pervert, and I love sex. My woman may not be a centerfold, but I’m never gonna grace any Cosmo pages either. She has what I want, and I want it every chance she will grant me.

  5. Rachael, Well said and I think you were very courageous to say what you said too! Good for you! As you know, I am one of those types of women who view sex with others as nothing more than a recreational activity to give and receive pleasure as you so well put it and I am lucky that my husband totally understands and supports my needs in that area.. But for me, there is only one man in this world who I will love unconditionally for the rest of my life and that is my husband and he feels the same for me.

    This world is big enough for all different types of relationships as long as both partners love and respect each other and no one gets hurt then I say great!!

    Thank you for this!!

  6. @Theone: How crazy would that be!? I’ve tried not to give too many identifying details about my life, but there are probably enough for him to figure out it was me if he ever found my blog. I’m counting on the fact that there are a million other porn sites out there for him to jerk off to and that he’s not one to pleasure himself to reading material. I also don’t think he’s into incest porn, but I can’t be 100% sure about that. If he did turn out to be a fan, then that would certainly make life rather interesting!

  7. Very well put on your “cheating” views/thoughts. You’re probably right that your husband might get upset but then again he’d need to realize the benefit from your writing/overall activities only benefits him so lucky him. Either way I’ll still pretend you offering your stocking clad feet to me after the exchange we had through lush message. lol

  8. Dear Rachael,

    You are one of the most full-of-sexual energy creatures I know. Full of fantasies, very open-minded to try, enjoy, create illimitated fantasies…

    And of course you are faithful to your husband!!!

    Hot kisses and great orgasms!
    Oscar

  9. You’re very fortunate that you’re in such a mutually committed relationship. I’ve never been so lucky myself. May you always be so blessed.

  10. I don’t get why people cheat, for some I think it’s the thrill of it. My husband and I have a solid marriage and we have been in a foursome once where I and the other woman explored each other and then I sucked both guys cocks while she ate my pussy. We ended by fucking our husbands. No swapping. It was a fun night and one we milked for a long time in terms of ‘pillow talk’!

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