Real Life Blues

I don’t know if anyone is still visiting my little blog here, but for those who are I wanted to post a quick note to explain my absence over the past many weeks. Unfortunately I’ve been contending with a serious medical issue that suddenly developed with a member of my family. This unexpected event has been dominating all my time and energy recently. Thankfully, the worst has passed, but there will be a great many demands on my time for the foreseeable future. I’m sorry that I didn’t let everyone know sooner about why I ‘disappeared,’ but this dirty little hobby of mine basically fell off my radar as soon as all the turmoil started.

To be honest, I was just going to let everything here go to the weeds. I was emotionally drained, and, in light of the sobering realities our family was facing, I felt somewhat guilty about shamefully indulging in nasty incest fantasies for my own prurient pleasure. I decided that this was entirely inappropriate, especially for a responsible married woman with children. The traumatic medical developments only made it more clear that I shouldn’t be wasting my energies writing pornographic stories and masturbating constantly. My intention was to simply be done with it. But…

The past several mornings I’ve found myself waking up horny…extremely horny. I tried to ignore it, but that obviously didn’t make it go away. The bothersome thing is that what’s making me especially horny is that I’ve been waking up with nascent story ideas floating around in my head. The other day it was a mother helping her self-conscious teenaged son measure his penis. This morning it was parents catching their daughter spying on their lovemaking and then inviting her to openly watch them as they fucked. This one affected me more than any of the others and I found myself sneaking into the bathroom before everyone else was awake and getting myself off with a desperate intensity that surprised me.

I started just rubbing myself through my panties, but knew that wasn’t going to be enough. I quickly got naked, intending to just get it over with and start my day. I had masturbated a few times over the past weeks, but it was more of a utilitarian stress-relief than anything truly pleasurable. This morning when my fingers slipped between my lips I discovered that I was insanely wet. I was annoyed with myself for getting like this with all that was going on, but there was nothing I could do about it. And, truth be told, my pussy felt fucking amazing!

I stood there in the bathroom for a long time just running my fingers up and down my soaking wet pussy lips. The lights were off with a hint of pre-dawn sun peeking in around the window shade. I lightly caressed my clit and teased my juicy hole. I became lost in the silky joys of my own body. My mind went back to my dream-like story fantasy. I pictured the girl being discovered by her lovemaking parents. They invite her into their bedroom and reassure her that they’re not upset with her. They encourage her to undress and watch them. She shyly strips out of her pajamas and her parents become further aroused by the site of their naked daughter. The girl watches her mother mount her father. She is fascinated by her dad’s huge, glistening penis. The daughter can’t resist masturbating herself as she watches her mother’s hairy pussy slide up and down her father’s thick tool.

By that point I was down on my knees pounding away at myself like a hopelessly depraved pervert. I tried to keep it quiet, but I almost couldn’t control myself. I was pumping the two middle fingers of my right hand in and out of my cunt hole like there was no tomorrow. The heel of my hand was banging against my stiff clit sending jolts of pure pleasure straight through me with each hammering thrust. I was pinching, pulling and twisting my nipples with my other hand while I beat off as fast as I could manage. I knew it was despicable to be behaving this way, especially while fantasizing about a girl licking her mom’s pussy juices off her father’s balls, but there was no stopping myself.

My orgasm doubled me over and took all the breath out of me. I knelt there hunched over with my fingers buried in my cunt and one nipple clamped between my thumb and forefinger for at least a full minute as I rode out every wave of the most intense climax I’d had in months. As soon as I’d milked every last tingle from that orgasm, I began diddling my hard clit and within twenty seconds I was cumming again. Fuck, that felt so damned good.

When my head finally began to clear, I stood up, rinsed my fingers off, used a damp washcloth to clean the wetness from the insides of my thighs, and put my robe on. I brushed my teeth, tried to ignore the dark circles under my eyes as I stared into the mirror, and sat down on the toilet to pee. Even this felt more pleasurable than usual. I looked down and could see that my pussy lips were still swollen and very tip of my clitty was just barely poking out. I gave it a friendly tweak, and before I knew it I was masturbating again. I came again right there on the toilet and was forced to admit that there was something going on with me.

I don’t know what to do about it, but it seems quite clear that this incest porn thing has worked itself deep into my psyche. Maybe it was always there and the writing has only brought it more to the surface. Whatever the case, it appears that no matter what my life situation is, I’m going to be thinking about this stuff and pleasuring myself to it one way or another. My big problem now is that I simply don’t have any time to resume writing and blogging the way I was (it has taken me 4 days just to write this post!). I dearly want to get back to all my nasty fun, but there’s no practicable way at this time. On top of everything else that’s going on, my older daughter is out of school for the summer, leaving me less than no free time.

Anyway, I still don’t know what (if anything) I can do, but I’m definitely thinking about it. I miss the thrill of my dirty writing and the naughty release of making myself cum after writing a hot scene. And I especially miss hearing from you guys. It was a unique pleasure to know that other people were getting off to my filthy fantasies. I’m hoping that with time things will calm down and get into a manageable routine. In the meantime, I will maybe try to find a way to snatch a few minutes here and there to do a little something when I’m able. I can’t make any promises, but we’ll see what happens.

Hugz and inappropriate touches on your no-no place,
Rachael

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11 thoughts on “Real Life Blues

  1. Thanks for letting us know. YOU take care of YOU and YOURS for now, and know that we’re always here for you. Family should always come first (no pun intended). Again, thanks for popping in. You don’t need to write a story each day, just let us know how it’s going with a few lines now and then.

    In your free time, I created a series starring you…kind of… http://www.lushstories.com/stories/exhibitionism/just-good-neighbors.aspx and Part 2 is http://www.lushstories.com/stories/exhibitionism/just-good-neighbors-2.aspx.

    Part 3 is on the way…

  2. Rachael,
    So sorry to hear about all that you’ve had to go through. I hope that everything turns out for the best. I can’t speak for everyone who follows you, but I am a true fan of yours. I waited patiently for your return before. I can do it again, and I will. Family always take priority. We will be here for you if you need us.

  3. You always post amazing stories and I understand what you mean in many ways…if you ever want to talk about it more, please let me know! I struggle with some of the same concerns you do with my often times busy life lately, sometimes I spend it taking lots of time to masturbate instead of getting other things done. Of course…If you need anything let me know! Hope things improve though with the family situations and what not.

  4. Hope things continue to get better!

    You still managed to turn an informative post into something as hot as your stories!

  5. Ohhhh, so sorry to hear your news. As TXtabber said your first priority must be your family. Well miss you so much but we don’t mind waiting for you. I can’t believe oh well you can describe your guilty pleasures. Don’t feel guilty, we all need release.
    Jay xxx

  6. I’m saddened to hear that you are dealing with trying times, Rachael… though it’s good to know that you are okay yourself, and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel in regard to your family’s health concerns. We’ll survive without our erotic fix for now; you go ahead and take care of the important things first. We’ll be wishing you the best, patiently awaiting your return.

  7. So glad to hear you are ok and so sorry for your family illness. Family comes first. Period. You are so talented your update was a story in itself!

  8. So sorry to hear about the issues you are dealing with regarding your family. I hope and pray things work out and get better for you and your family. It was great to hear from you and I look forward to reading more down the road. Good luck with everything!

  9. Hi Rachael, I am so sorry to hear that you have been going through such a tough time and that someone close to you has been having health issues. Its exhausting physically and emotionally meeting such a time. I hope you are finding some time for yourself. I totally understand all you spoke of. I actually joined Lush to tell you how erotic and arousing I found your stories. It was lovely to exchange a few words with you. I ended up deleting my Lush account as, like you, events in my life made it impossible to have the (delicious) distraction of what Lush brings. Also I found the hyper-aroused state that lush evoked became hard to balance with my studies and life. I have adored your stories, and enjoy reading them numerous times. I noticed that Lush changed their policies, but you kindly created this page so we can still get the pleasure of your creative, erotic and utterly sexy fantasies.

    I truly hope that the medical issue resolves and health returns and you can re charge your energies. We love what you write, but I completely understand and relate to the questions you ask yourself as to exploring these perverted fantasies we are drawn to and aroused by. Just you mentioning the thoughts you had of the new scenarios that came to you had me dripping. Tend to those who need you and we will all be here in any way we can whenever you have time and if you want to share this peculiar predilection.

    All the best thoughts and wishes to you and your family.

    Love Justin xx

    Wishing y

  10. Sorry to hear about your family matters hope things work themself out. Was really great to hear from you again missed your nasty post & story’s. You didn’t say did you ever have achance to use that dildo you bougth what size did you get? Well you take care of your self & family. Pop in when you are able to let us know how you are doing. Don’t always have to write a story. But your update was as hot as your story’s. You take care I f you ever want to just unload sometime always willing to listen.

  11. While I’m saddened that your time has been curtailed by pressing family matters, I am relieved that nothing serious happened to you personally. I was wondering if you literally dropped off the earth, not just dropped off the internet. Real life has an unpleasant way of making things beyond our control dominate our lives.

    But, desire finds a way. I’m certain you will find a way to keep your deliciously deviant hobby alive, in some form or another. Good to have you back, in some form or another.

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